Anti jokes

A man walks up to a bar, says to the bartender "Hey, can I get a drink?" The bartender hands him one.

Then he asks for another.

And another.
And another.

Then the dude's driving home pretty slammed, and he's mumbling some weird words and stuff, and then he crashes into a tree on the way to his house and is killed on impact.

An Irish fella, an English geezer and a Scotsman walk into a bar.

They drink the heads of themselves, get into several fights, urinate against the bar, get arrested and fined 2500 €.

So an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar.

The Englishman orders a pint of beer, Scotsman a whisky and Irishman a Guinness.